Things It Took Me A While To Learn: Modern Success is a House of Cards
I’m starting this post with the intent to turn it into a series titled “Things It Took Me A While To Learn”. I think Tony Dunst (Bond18) did or does a similar blogging series. It’s kind of a great idea; anytime you can share stuff it took you a while to learn with other people, the world is probably better off for it. It’s taken me a while to learn that “success” in this day and age is a mirage.
I think for a lot of people in our society, especially young people, the world seems like this big, shiny, awesome place. We see celebrities on TV and in magazines all the time. We see expensive cars, big houses, high-end clothing, and other tell-tale signs of “rich people”. We see all this advertising showing people having a great time at the bar or club laughing with their friends. For men, we see gorgeous women all the time who almost seem unreal and out of reach. We’re programmed by society to view society as awesome, fabulous, and nearly without blemish. It’s our job to try to keep up!
What it’s taken me a long time to learn is that all of these flashing lights are mostly just noise. We see only the sexy, glamorous, and positive side of most things. What we don’t see is the absurd amount of debt and suffering people deal with to keep up with a lifestyle they have bought into. We don’t see the little girl who just wants to be loved and thinks that $2,000 hand bags and starving herself are the ticket to receiving attention and happiness. And until a few years ago, we didn’t even realize that the $25,000 gold ice cream sundaes that Wall Streeters brag about having tried are being paid for by future generations.
The world has mortgaged itself into senselessness. We live in an interesting time and place where we get to see a lot of the positives of this greed (the big houses, nice cars, ritzy lifestyles) but not the negatives. What we don’t yet fully see is that our government that is completely broke. We don’t yet see that depleting resources and purchasing power is making the middle class a thing of the past. What we haven’t yet realized is that many of these people whose “success” we’re trying to duplicate are just the benefactors of a “too big to fail” system that robs opportunities from posterity.
It’s a confusing era in which we live because on one hand we see all of these pretty, flashy things and equate them with what it must mean to succeed. Yet on the other hand, we fail to realize that these pretty, flashy things are in the hands of people who are miserable, stupid and/or greedy scumbags. Do you ever think about why our government gave hundreds of billions to banks instead of just giving $15,000 to every American household? Both of those things make just as much sense as the other (no sense at all).
We live in a world where the bad guys have won. Greed has prevailed. All that “hope” and “change” people were chanting for three years ago? Guess what? It’s not coming. Our government does not look out for the people. Our government looks out for the short-term best interest of the markets. The people are no longer the constituents. Capital is the new constituent. You’re either an owner or owned.
When the people getting VIP bottle service at a club are the ones who are viewed as “successful”, it tells you a lot about our society. Success used to mean working hard so you could afford to buy your own house. Success used to mean spending thousands of hours on a project or a cause to do your part to advance humanity one small, incremental step. Now success is about who can grab the most cash the fastest.
What I would say to anyone dealing with tension in their lives from trying to reach this repulsive ideal of “success” in our society is to ask yourself a few questions:
- Am I generally a happy person?
- Do I feel like I make a positive difference in the world (even if it is a small one)?
- Do I have a few people in my life who truly love me and care about me?
- Am I making enough money to meet my basic needs with a little bit left over for some fun once in a while?
- And are my “basic needs” reasonable and prudent?
If you can answer yes to all of those questions, I think you’re doing everything right already. You are successful. You are the person whose success others should be striving to duplicate. I’m embarrassed it took me so long to realize this truism. I spent way too many years chasing the mainstream, tabloid version of “success” without realizing it’s just noise.
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